My new composition that probably needs serious correction.

[xuechengfeng]

Just the beginning of it, still more to write when I figure out how you speak of an interesting dinner in 100-200 characters.

昨天晚上王先生的家里到我的家来玩玩跟吃晚饭了。我内人做了很多很多牛肉，糖醋YU，跟饺子。王太太说他没看见很多反。我们吃了反以后，我请王先生来花拳了。我说他把玫瑰露酒拿近来。

i added in tang cu yu cuz i couldn't find that character, and i used the wrong one for najinlai cuz i couldn't find jin

how does this look

[林彪]

Your character for "Food" is wrong. It should be 饭.

[pazu]

Not bad, but as you have said, corrections are needed too. Most are not seriously mistakes and some are subtle, be careful. Only one mistake is serious, that's the one in bold. If you use pinyin, you should be able to find the word "YU' very easily.

昨天晚上王先生的家里到我的家来玩玩跟吃晚饭了。我内人做了很多很多牛肉，糖醋YU，跟饺子。王太太说他没看见很多反。我们吃了反以后，我请王先生来花拳了。我说他把玫瑰露酒拿近来。

These are some unnatural points.. sorry, it looks that there're a lot.

的(of)家里 => 一家人 (yi jia ren), and you should omit the 的

我的家 => my home, but in this situation you should say 我們家

玩玩 => 玩 in this situation, one "wan" only. Wanwan sounds like Mr Wang is coming for something funny, laughable...

跟 => better use the word 和, they mean the same, but in this situation "he" is clearer.

我内人 => 內人 is enough. "Inner person" implied "My" already. It's a humble word. Depends on the nature of your composition, I would rather use 我老婆. But some may find it "not appropriate".

很多很多 => it's an necessary emphasize. 很多 is enough.

，跟 => no comma, use "he" (和)

他没看见很多反 => meaning not clear

花拳 => wrong character

我说他 => Wrong use of "shuo". SHould use 請他 (ask/request politely), or you can say, "我叫他" (I call him).

[xuechengfeng]

thanks for the review, i took it into my teacher today and this is the correction i came back with

昨天晚上王先生一家人到我的家来玩玩跟吃晚饭。我内人做了很多牛肉，糖醋渔，跟饺子。王太太说他没看见过多饭。我们吃了饭以后，我请王先生来划拳了。我请他把玫瑰拿近来。

looks pretty similar. i'll take your correction into consideration.

is your use of he traditional or simplified? i haven't learned that in our book yet, surprisingly.

i'd rather use that, is it just 8 strokes?

[xuechengfeng]

昨天晚上王先生一家人到我的家来玩玩跟吃晚饭。我内人做了很多牛肉，糖醋渔，跟饺子。王太太说他没看见过多饭。王先生的孩子没吃过糖醋渔。我想那么很奇怪！他吃的时候说不但好的很，而且比别的饭好的多。除了饺子王先生一家人甚么都喜欢。我们吃了饭以后，我要请王先生来划拳了。我请他把玫瑰拿近来，可是他没要划拳，因为不会。他要到电影院去，可是我没有钱，所以我们看电视。我们看电视以后，王先生说对他的一家人：“很晚了，我们走吧。”我说对他们，“我们的晚饭很有意思，希望你们一定来见！”

ok this is my full composition, we'll see how this goes!

[pazu]

Not trying to discourage you, but there're some stubborn mistakes in your newest composition. And below is still one of the unclear points that you haven't tried clarifying yourself.

王太太说他没看见过多饭。

YU (fish) is still wrong.

[galitonwu]

you need to attention these two sentences :

我说对他们

王先生说对他的一家人

the correct answer is:

我对他们说：

王先生对他的一家人说：

[39degN]

王太太说他没看见过多饭。

YU (fish) is still wrong.

i guess he means:

王太太说她从来没见过这么多菜。

[goldenchang]

昨天晚上王先生一家人到我的家来玩玩跟吃晚饭。我内人做了很多牛肉，糖醋渔，跟饺子。王太太说他没看见过多饭。王先生的孩子没吃过糖醋渔。我想那么很奇怪！他吃的时候说不但好的很，而且比别的饭好的多。除了饺子王先生一家人甚么都喜欢。我们吃了饭以后，我要请王先生来划拳了。我请他把玫瑰拿近来，可是他没要划拳，因为不会。他要到电影院去，可是我没有钱，所以我们看电视。我们看电视以后，王先生说对他的一家人：“很晚了，我们走吧。”我说对他们，“我们的晚饭很有意思，希望你们一定来见！”

昨天晚上王先生一家人到我的家来玩顺便一起吃了晚饭。我内人做了很多菜，有牛肉，糖醋鱼，还有饺子。王太太说她没看见过多菜，王先生的孩子说没吃过糖醋鱼，我想这真奇怪！他吃的时候说不但好的很，而且比别的菜好的多（这是废话——多余）。除了饺子，王先生一家人甚么都喜欢。我们吃了饭以后，我要邀王先生划拳。我请他把玫瑰拿进来，可是他不愿划拳，因为不会。他要到电影院去看电影，可是我没有钱，所以只好看电视。我们看完电视以后，王先生对他的家人说：“很晚了，我们走吧。”我对他们说：“很高兴我们能一起吃晚饭，希望你们一定再来！”

[xuechengfeng]

对不起太麻烦了。谢谢你们。

pazu: what I guess I'm trying to say is 王太太对我们说：“没看见过多饭”

Which is a poor attempt in Chinese, but my goal was too say "Mrs. Wang said to us, "I have never seen so much food before."

And I know how to write "yu," but I cannot seem to relate it to the simplified version on my NJStar Chinese WP.

galitonwu: 对了，谢谢您。

goldenchang: thank you for pointing out my errors, your version makes much more sense, however, i am lost on some of those characters, they are too advanced 4 me.

顺

便

邀

愿

一起 also the same as 一块?

[Quest]

Which is a poor attempt in Chinese, but my goal was too say "Mrs. Wang said to us, "I have never seen so much food before."

so much = this much ＝这么多

much food (on a dinner table) = 多菜 not 多饭

[xuechengfeng]

well, i had the teacher help me correct again, and was very close to what you guys said, so i'm glad i can trust u!

the teach said for the level i am at, my composition is surprisingly good. however, she said i need to add a little more detail. any idea of what i should elaborate on

[pazu]

i can trust u!

Indeed I think if your teacher gave you something different from us, what you should do, is to find a new teacher... you can always trust the Chinese here.

[xuechengfeng]

some of your suggestions i can't take because we haven't learned the characters in the book, so my teachers eyebrows will raise!

here is my final copy, although the teacher says i need a little more detail!

昨天晚上王先生一家人到我们家来玩和吃晚饭。内人做了很多菜，有牛肉，糖醋鱼，还有饺子。王太太说他没看见过这么菜。王先生的孩子没吃过糖醋鱼。我想真奇怪！他吃的得候说糖醋鱼不但好的很，而且比别的菜好的多。除了饺子，王先生一家人甚么都喜欢。我们吃了饭以后，我要请王先生来划拳。我请他把一瓶玫瑰露拿近来，可是他不想划拳，因为他不会。他要到电影院去看电影，可是我没有钱，所以我们看了电视。我们看了电视以后，王先生对他的家人说：“很晚了，我们走吧。”我对他们说：“我们的晚饭很有意思，希望你们一定再来！”

[Quest]

Indeed I think if your teacher gave you something different from us, what you should do, is to find a new teacher... you can always trust the Chinese here.

咪係啰，有啲人係中意嗷，死话你啲本地人讲得唔啱，写得唔啱，学得唔啱，用得唔啱。当我哋一路以嚟係读屎片嘅。

[pazu]

Very good Xuechengfeng, but still some minor mistakes.

王太太说他没看见过这么菜 => 王太太说她没看见过这么多菜

Indeed, it still sounds a bit unnatural to Chinese ears, but perfectly okay for a composition.

他吃的得候说糖醋鱼不但好的很 => 他吃的时候

我请他把一瓶玫瑰露拿近来 => 拿过来 or 拿进来

我们的晚饭很有意思 => this sounds strange too. Indeed it sounds strange too in English... Our dinner is very interesting... hmm... I think you can say "tonight is very happy" (我们今晚很高兴)

[xuechengfeng]

if I am talking in past tense and wanting to say "our dinner WAS very happy"

would it still b

我们今晚很高兴

[xuechengfeng]

additional part

昨天晚上王先生一家人到我们家来玩和吃晚饭。内人做了很多菜，有牛肉，糖醋鱼，还有饺子。王太太说他没看见过这么菜。王先生的孩子没吃过糖醋鱼。我想真奇怪！他吃的得候说糖醋鱼不但好的很，而且比别的菜好的多。除了饺子，王先生一家人甚么都喜欢。我们吃了饭以后，我要请王先生来划拳。我请他把一瓶玫瑰露拿近来，可是他不想划拳，因为他不会。他要到电影院去看电影，可是我没有钱，所以我们看了电视。就百先生来拜访。他来的时候，我们都去在外头喝茶和谈谈。百先生第一次来。他对说：“你家这个地方很好啊。山水这么漂亮。茶也很好！”我想他太客气了。我们喝了茶以后，王先生对他的家人说：“很晚了，我们走吧。”我对他们说：“我们今晚很高兴，希望你们一定再来！”

still need more detail!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[roddy]

玩和吃晚饭

You don't need 和 to join verbs, you can just put them next to each other (maybe with a comma). I don't think its wrong, just sounds a bit excessive.

没看见过这么菜

I'd miss the 见 here, sounds unnatural.

就百先生来拜访

Are you trying to use 就 as 'then'? You can do this in the sense of 'if . . . then . . .', but not in the sense of 'and next . . .'. Use 然后？

去在外头

Are you going there, or are you there?

Now I'll sit back and wait for the corrections of my corrections . . .

Roddy

[xuechengfeng]

我们在里头，要去外头。

谢谢您。