Is this sentence correct?

[Scoobyqueen]

The following sentence is supposed to say "first Mr. so and so, head of the international department, will be presenting the company's activities":

首先由Mr. xyz 先生主持我公司国际部门的演讲活动。

Thanks for any help.

[kurii]

Perfectly fine.

Edited September 20, 2009 at 02:55 PM by kurii
redundancy deleted

[fengyixiao]

不对吧，“head of the international department”是“Mr. so and so”的职位，而不是他要主持的演讲所属的部门。

正确翻译应该是（My opinion）：

（首先）（国际部门的主管）（Mr. xyz先生） （将会）（主持）（演讲活动）。

核心句子是：（Mr. xyz先生） （主持）（演讲活动）。

（国际部门的主管）是对（Mr. xyz先生）的修饰语，而不是（演讲活动）的修饰语。

该怎么翻译，我觉得可以分3种情况：

1、仅仅是给上司的关于组织此次演讲的报告，主管Mr.xyz并不在场

翻译：（首先，）本次演讲活动将由国际部的主管Mr.xyz先生来主持。

重点强调此次演讲活动。

first在英语原句中类似“发语词”，实际意义不大，译成汉语似乎可以省略。

2、在会议上提交报告，主管Mr.xyz在场

翻译：国际部的主管Mr.xyz将主持此次演讲活动。

强调国际部的主管Mr.xyz

3、演讲比赛现场

翻译：（有请）国际部的主管Mr.xyz主持此次演讲活动！

first翻译成“有请”，注重礼貌和对主管Mr.xyz的尊重。

Edited September 21, 2009 at 06:59 AM by fengyixiao

[trien27]

首先由Mr. xyz 先生主持我公司国际部门的演讲活动。

首先由我们公司国际部门主管 xyz 先生来主持有关这项活动的演讲。It's always 我们公司*, never 我公司* because as a clarification, a company is almost always a body of people working together, not just one person.

* 我公司 could = 我们公司 if the audience knows who you are.

What I meant was sometimes if it's like a company started by one person and there's no other owners or board of directors, then that single person is the boss, where if it's an American company, the individualism would come out and it could only mean "我" = "我" and not short for "我们".

我公司 = 我的公司 = My company

我们公司 = 我们的公司 = Our company

我家 = 我的家庭 = My family

我学校 = 我的学校 = My school

我大学 = 我的大学 = My college / university

我国 = 我的国家 = My country

Edited September 24, 2009 at 12:53 AM by trien27
additional information

[James Johnston]

I'm not sure Trien27 is right to say that it is "never" 我公司. Certainly a search on Google for "我公司" gives 27,000,000 results. That's a awful lot of American individualist companies in China. And after all, 我家， 我学校， 我大学， 我国 are all commonly used to indicate membership of a corporate group not ownership.

Perhaps I misunderstood Trien27's comment and it meant "never in this context", in which case ignore my comment.

Edited September 23, 2009 at 11:27 AM by James Johnston

[muyongshi]

I'm not sure but could the difference be in the audience. If you are talking to your coworkers then perphaps 我们公司 would be better. But as it stands if you are referring to your company, your schoool, whatever 我司，我公司，我校 are all ok and quite often used.