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Dating in China


newforeigner

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I can't help it, some of the best fiction stories originate from real life :)

American (?) Professor falls in love with a beautiful Chinese student in (wherever). But can he navigate the culture boundaries that keep them worlds apart?

Mine the forums a bit and this story writes itself. Dating, marriage, in-laws, pregnancy and having cats, do the inlaws move in, will she spoon-feed him the language, did she just use him for a visa, will the inlaws use the baby seat in the car, what are his rights in case of divorce, the possibilities are endless.
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And the protagonists must have tattoos in Chinese which do not mean what they are supposed to mean.

Or even better in Japanese or Korean or Arabic or Klingon which they think is Chinese.

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Or the Irishman who was new to China Girl and tried to give said Girl a peck on the cheek after a fabulous meal (Chinese QuXi Jie) and talk only to be pushed away. She didn't call for several days as she is ultra busy and I was totally disillusioned, worried that that was not it. We now are expecting our second child in six weeks. Rollercoaster, "Welcome to Shenyang, please fasten your seatbelt"!

ps @OP I am with the others, "cut your losses".

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I can't help it, some of the best fiction stories originate from real life :)

American (?) Professor falls in love with a beautiful Chinese student in (wherever). But can he navigate the culture boundaries that keep them worlds apart?

And will he find out that she is really the demon reincarnation of the first Qin emperor bent on regaining control over everything under heaven? Only love can restore balance to the world...

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Better yet, he can be the reincarnation of Empress Lü. Or she's Qin Shihuang and he was a buried scholar. Anyway, mine Chinese history and even more good stuff comes up!

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I met her by chance again two weeks ago. I did not see her at the beginning. She called my name from inside a store. She asked me to wait for her. She came out and said that she was out of town for about 12 days. During this time, she used another SIM card. As a result, she did not read my messages. She said that she was going to reply. Again, she "seemed" to be very friendly. She showed me where she lives. I walked her to her apartment and we separated. I asked her for dinner and she agreed. When I sent her a message to ask when she would be available that week. She said "it depends." I asked her what she meant by "it depends" and depends on what? Never heard from her for a week. Is she a playgirl playing with my mind? If she does not want to go out with me, she can just say no. Why she called me from inside a store and asked me to wait for her to have a chat? She is confusing me.

This evening, I had dinner with a student. It was just a friend relationship. She came in half an hour late. When we finished dinner, she asked the waitress for the bill. I took out my wallet and she put back hers. I paid but she did not even say thank you. Is this common in China?

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If she does not want to go out with me, she can just say no.

Relatively few girls in the whole world do this. They mostly do what you've described - pleasant in person but inaccessible and distant otherwise. Take a hint and learn your lesson - it will come in handy many more times down the road.

Is this common in China?

Taking a university student out for dinner might be seen as unusual nearly anywhere in the world. Probably considered very inappropriate in the West.

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