jj52 Posted November 2, 2017 at 04:34 AM Report Share Posted November 2, 2017 at 04:34 AM [Deleted] 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
abcdefg Posted November 2, 2017 at 08:25 AM Report Share Posted November 2, 2017 at 08:25 AM This sounds like a good plot for a movie, or better yet, a 电视剧 (TV soap opera series.) ---------------- I don't mean to make light of your conundrum. I just don't have any sensible advice to offer. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xinyi Zhang Posted November 2, 2017 at 08:45 AM Report Share Posted November 2, 2017 at 08:45 AM (⊙o⊙)… I grew up in the Chinese culture，but I can't give a sound advice. I never fall in love with someone. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
roddy Posted November 2, 2017 at 08:52 AM Report Share Posted November 2, 2017 at 08:52 AM There's some relevant reading here. Not much to add personally, but good luck. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
roddy Posted November 2, 2017 at 08:54 AM Report Share Posted November 2, 2017 at 08:54 AM 4 hours ago, jj52 said: How should I bring this up to my parents? Should I wait until we start dating first? By all that you hold dear and holy, yes. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
somethingfunny Posted November 2, 2017 at 09:13 AM Report Share Posted November 2, 2017 at 09:13 AM How sure are you that your best friend feels the same way about you? 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lu Posted November 2, 2017 at 09:54 AM Report Share Posted November 2, 2017 at 09:54 AM Hi JJ, that sounds like a tough situation. I don't have any specific advice beyond 'hang in there'. Also perhaps don't put the cart before the horse: as I understand it, your best friend doesn't even know yet that you are attracted to her, so at this point there is no situation yet to tell your parents. Also, how old are you? Are you still in school and living with your parents? If so, the situation may become a bit easier for you once you are out of the house and making your own money, it will give you more space to date whoever you like. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
889 Posted November 2, 2017 at 10:25 AM Report Share Posted November 2, 2017 at 10:25 AM As well, wait till you're past thirty and your parents will be so glad you're getting married that your spouse's identity won't concern them at all. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
roddy Posted November 2, 2017 at 11:15 AM Report Share Posted November 2, 2017 at 11:15 AM Ok, maybe I do have a few things to add... At root, you don't have a Chinese-family issue. You have an overbearing / abusive parent issue, combined with some unrequited love and (if you're the age I think you are) some over-early thinking about getting married. None of these are fun, but the answers aren't rooted in Chinese culture - they'll come from you figuring out what you want and how to get it. Part of that will probably involve a period of less contact with any parents who are more concerned with what they want than what you want. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
snowflake Posted November 3, 2017 at 09:06 PM Report Share Posted November 3, 2017 at 09:06 PM My suggestion is not to bring it up unless you're prepared for them to react with things like threatening to cut off supporting you and various types of emotional blackmail. If you haven't already, become financially independent and move out to someplace pretty far away......Seriously. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
大肚男 Posted November 9, 2017 at 08:59 PM Report Share Posted November 9, 2017 at 08:59 PM Also, I would wait until I'm dating my best friend, who may or may not share your feelings before saying anything to the parents. I don't see the point of upsetting the parents for no reason, and doing so may even push them to put their plans in turbo mode, and sabotage your chances with your friend Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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