Chris Two Times Posted March 4, 2015 at 11:08 AM Report Share Posted March 4, 2015 at 11:08 AM But 2 or 3 days later they will ask to have sex in a very direct way. Regarding the above quote, the following may be an unpopular thing to say here, but I can't resist so Imma gonna go ahead and just say it: "So...what's the problem?" Warm regards, Chris Two Times 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris Two Times Posted March 4, 2015 at 11:12 AM Report Share Posted March 4, 2015 at 11:12 AM As a general rule of thumb, unless you're in a romantic comedy, putting your life on pause, flying across the world, crashing a wedding, and continually imposing your presence on a family who wants nothing to do with you is extremely fucked up. Why are you still interested in being with someone who would treat you poorly (according to your story, anyway) and make a decision like this? She's not worth it! This is the point where you're supposed to move on with your life. Instead, he goes to China and contacts multiple members of her family, her boyfriend, etc and tries to crash a wedding. I wholeheartedly agree with the above two quotes. Warm regards, Chris Two Times 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
danielfd Posted March 6, 2015 at 02:55 PM Report Share Posted March 6, 2015 at 02:55 PM But 2 or 3 days later they will ask to have sex in a very direct way. Regarding the above quote, the following may be an unpopular thing to say here, but I can't resist so Imma gonna go ahead and just say it: "So...what's the problem?" Warm regards, Chris Two Times ....... When someone invite me to his house for dinner I don't usually have sex with his wife/gf, even if she keep insisting to cheat on him. I do have a problem with that. It is such a turn off for me, sorry. If that is not a problem for you, good for you. You can invite me to your house & introduce me your wife/gf 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
realmayo Posted March 6, 2015 at 04:39 PM Report Share Posted March 6, 2015 at 04:39 PM I'm not quite sure that's how it works. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JustinJJ Posted March 6, 2015 at 10:56 PM Report Share Posted March 6, 2015 at 10:56 PM Maybe Danielfd is just trolling or bragging because he's trying to make people think that he must be so appealing since Chinese women will cheat to have an opportunity with him, then complains that so many girls want to sleep with him, so he must be some kind of sex symbol / celebrity... The reality is he stalked a girl to China and got rejected 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris Two Times Posted March 7, 2015 at 08:14 AM Report Share Posted March 7, 2015 at 08:14 AM To piggyback off of JustinJJ's above post, which I can agree with, as I have thought more and more about this thread, I am wondering if/thinking that Mr. Daniel simply got played. I am thinking that the young lady (oh! showing my age by using such a phrase!) knew the score all along and knew how it was going to go down, but in the meantime why not "have a little fun" and enjoy a little sexy face time (or whatever the kids call it nowadays) and enjoy a three-month vacation with a lot of the expenses paid for? I largely agree with Simon_CH's words on page six of this thread. Why would one pay for someone else's hotels and flights for three months even though they only dated for a short period of time, regardless of love or whatever reasons really? Just my two 份. Warm regards, Chris Two Times Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
abcdefg Posted March 7, 2015 at 08:39 AM Author Report Share Posted March 7, 2015 at 08:39 AM I can't comment or make any judgements about the motives of the people involved in this drama. And I'm not arguing with anything that has been said. Am only answering Chris' question in the post just above this one: Why would one pay for someone else's hotels and flights for three months even though they only dated for a short period of time, regardless of love or whatever reasons really? I've done that in years past simply in return for pleasant companionship and would consider doing it again if circumstances were right. Well, actually three months might be a little too long. It would depend on the quality of the relationship. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
danielfd Posted March 8, 2015 at 12:12 AM Report Share Posted March 8, 2015 at 12:12 AM I did what I had to do, I had no choice. My girlfriend told me her family was pushing her to marry a guy she didn't love & didn't want to marry him. That she didn't want to get married so early as chinese girls usually do. She was saying she was having best time ever, that she loved me. 2 weeks before getting engaged she bought a book to learn spanish. She was sweet & passionate as always. Calling every day, etc. She was living by herself by then & her family was pushing her to go back to her parents house. During our 2-3 months vacations I meet most of her friends. She gave them all kind of details... She never got a call from the chines guy, only from her mom. I would say it is weird to get married with a guy you didn't talk for months or years... After she got engaged she was a totally different person. When I arrived to China she said she coulnd't said No to me... When I tried to stop the wedding she told me if I wanted her to get killed All in all everything was really confusing. After that she just said denied everything. She said everything was a lie & that she loves her husband. (Never saw this kind of love... ) I don't know wether all that it was true or not.Maybe she just played with me for 1 year. (but seems pretty weird) I can only know what she told me. This doesn't look like a healthy marriage to me. I don't understand people who gets married with someone they have no feelings for. Maybe is the reason why some chinese girls want to cheat on their bf or husbands. If Mr. 愛爾蘭 knows something I don't... please, explain to me. What do you mean with "move on when the relation is over"? To get out of the way when a chinese guy forces some girl into marriage?? Well, maybe that works for chinese guys, but definitely doesn't work for me & for most of foreigners. I did what I had to do & if could chose I wouldn't doubt for a second & I will do it again. Those of you saying I should just moved on & not go to China to stop the "arrange married" are just cowards. If by any chance she told me something different & become distant, I would just give up. But this wasn't the case. I will never accept the idea of an arranged married. When your girlfriend tells you her family is forcing her to marry a guy she does not love you should do something about it. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr. 愛爾蘭 Posted March 11, 2015 at 11:36 PM Report Share Posted March 11, 2015 at 11:36 PM People get married for all sorts of reasons, many of which I disagree with. You and I are on the same page here -- getting married to someone you barely know for reasons besides love isn't a good idea. That still doesn't mean it is appropriate to show up uninvited and try to put a stop to it. When is the relationship over? The relationship is over when one of the parties says it's over. She ended the relationship and asked you not come to China. Then she became engaged and started acting cold and distant -- an obvious sign that she wants you to back off. Instead of getting the message, you flew to China. Once in China, her friends and family were initially friendly, likely because they assumed you were a friend, not a jilted lover (she didn't tell them the truth about you guys -- she had moved on). You tried to interrupt the wedding and aggressively confronted them (the boyfriend, anyway) until they called the police. She then denied you guys ever had a relationship. Pick any of the above sentences for when the relationship is over, preferrably one near the start of the paragraph. Your ex-gf is an adult. She's capable of making decisions for herself. She told you she was getting married and asked you not to interfere. You didn't respect her wishes. If she requested your assistance in getting out of the wedding or wanted to stay with you overseas, then this would be a different story. She broke up with you, and you wouldn't let it go. If by any chance she told me something different & become distant, I would just give up. But this wasn't the case. Maybe I'm misunderstanding you because your posts have indicated that she became cold and distant after her engagement and told you not to come to China -- this is when you should've given up. So what actually happened? When your girlfriend tells you her family is forcing her to marry a guy she does not love you should do something about it. I agree. However, you shouldn't act without her consent because she isn't a child or a piece of property, and if she's already broken up with you then you should move on with your life! And you certainly shouldn't do this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1yq5tnoT3fo 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jbradfor Posted March 12, 2015 at 05:23 PM Report Share Posted March 12, 2015 at 05:23 PM When your girlfriend tells you her family is forcing her to marry a guy she does not love you should do something about it. If the forcing is at gunpoint, call the police. If the "forcing" is just applying pressure, and she's chosen someone else, then backoff. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
abcdefg Posted March 14, 2015 at 07:31 AM Author Report Share Posted March 14, 2015 at 07:31 AM I did what I had to do, I had no choice. Not really. You always have a choice. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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