pookie Posted October 20, 2005 at 03:23 PM Report Share Posted October 20, 2005 at 03:23 PM Hi, I've had the fortune to meet and get to know a good many girls from both China and Taiwan over the last few years. I've noticed quite a difference in their expectations from a relationship. The Chinese girls see a bit more conservative but easy going in terms of 'love is all that matters', and not how much money or whether the guy has a BMW. Taiwanese girls are more open initially but appear far more materialistic and place great emphasis on the status of the guy and his cash reserves. I have to point out that these are all PG students studying in the UK. Are they different at home? Personally I think I prefer the Chinese girls, even if they do wear thick glasses, jeans, and a practical water proof all the time The last part was not intended to sterotype. No more than 85% dress in this way Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
necroflux Posted October 20, 2005 at 04:55 PM Report Share Posted October 20, 2005 at 04:55 PM I can attest to your observation about the Taiwanese girls being very materialistic, not from any relationships of my own but I was inundated with that fact from just about everyone during my trip to Taiwan. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Celso Pin Posted October 20, 2005 at 05:11 PM Report Share Posted October 20, 2005 at 05:11 PM "Gays males like man... women like money" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fhwong Posted October 20, 2005 at 05:12 PM Report Share Posted October 20, 2005 at 05:12 PM I have to say that these are probably the type of girls you are attracting. I am guessing that you are English? And girls that are here and are looking for a european boyfriend are looking for materialistic things. I prefer Taiwanese girls from any other due to their attitude, outlook on life and general "street wiseness", but all the ones that I have chosen or met have not been as you describe. But then I am Chinese so this may have something to do with it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HashiriKata Posted October 20, 2005 at 08:03 PM Report Share Posted October 20, 2005 at 08:03 PM I'm open-minded and all-embracing! (Joke! ) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pookie Posted October 21, 2005 at 10:45 AM Author Report Share Posted October 21, 2005 at 10:45 AM I agree that the fact they're here studying in the UK probably influences their outlook on life and significantly increases the chance that they are attracted to western guys...maybe with some money. But the Chinese girls here don't seem to be the same, so I suspect there is some cultural difference too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ferno Posted October 21, 2005 at 11:45 PM Report Share Posted October 21, 2005 at 11:45 PM obviously, since Taiwan was swamped by American culture for 50 years. Give the mainland Chinese some time, though... and i think women are programmed to be materialistic in terms of partners, the culture just compounds it in varying degrees. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wai ming Posted October 22, 2005 at 04:52 AM Report Share Posted October 22, 2005 at 04:52 AM Interesting... a lot of the undergraduate girls from Mainland China at my university seem to be pretty materialistic, in fact from the way they dress and act I'd say they're possibly even more materialistic than the Taiwanese. Then again, quite a few of them are from Shanghai, maybe that's got something to do with it Of course I'm using huge generalisations here, and to top it off I'm judging people by their appearances (since I'm a girl and have no interest in getting into a romantic relationship with either Chinese/Taiwanese girls - or any other girls, for that matter ). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
syu.edu Posted October 22, 2005 at 06:37 AM Report Share Posted October 22, 2005 at 06:37 AM i know this is pretty personal stuff so there can't be a personal answer. but anyway i would like to ask you. yesterday i went to a disco with a couple of friends and there was this hot, very drunken taiwanese lady, dancing like ... well, minors shouldnt watch it. anyway, she seemed to enjoy dancing, but later that evening she hang herself on my shoulders (as written before, she was very drunk), sleeping a few seconds and making a terribly exhausted face to me. i asked her if she wanted to go home, and she agreed. well, at that time she can't walk, so i decided it would be the best thing to bring her home. she is a student in my city (different university though). so i finally brought her back home, we talked about some same things a couple of times until she told me she is tired and wants to sleep. then she asked me if i could stay that night. i thought, ok, maybe thats even better seeing how drunk she was (maybe she would need some help going to toilette sometime...). then today she told me she felt sick (like throwing up) so i told her i have some "anti-throwing up" medcine in my dormitory. she was happy i asked her if she wants some. on our way out of the appartement, she grabbed my hand and told me how cool it would be if i came to her classes and she could introduce me to her friends as her boyfriend. OOOOPS? boyfriend? i dont know, is she joking? there are some reasons why i think she might be joking... i am 20. she is 25. she has a boyfriend (though, she told me he is not very nice to her). she is hot (she is a model and showed me some of her photographs... one of them, she told me, is widely used for beer advertisment) and i am just a normal student. at least in my opinion. in germany that would be called "she is a higher class"... haha, you know, nerds, cheerleaders. yeah, well, she will buy a new mobile phone today and wants to call me... she is a very nice girl, very good looking, but she 25 and i am 20. i can't believe that this is nothing for her.. anyway, maybe you guys have some more experience with this kind of situation. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Song You Shen Posted October 22, 2005 at 07:02 AM Report Share Posted October 22, 2005 at 07:02 AM haha, yeah, i dated a blond girl who was 4 years older than me... and she had a twin sister! hahahha. I wouldn't put it past a girl... a sincerely kind guy is difficult to find. Being genuine with a girl is a great way to get them... especially since you met her with such an ice-breaker. You might not have ever talked with her, or anything if she had not been drunk... haha Youshen Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bhchao Posted October 22, 2005 at 05:33 PM Report Share Posted October 22, 2005 at 05:33 PM I dated a Taiwanese girl who was 5 years older than me. After all this time I thought we were the same age or she was younger. She has a very nice personality, highly popular (when we sipped coffee on our first date, another girl came into the coffeehouse and said hi). The only problem is she appears to be highly materialistic. For example she drives a Mercedes SUV here in LA. During our conversations, she mentioned that she never rides the subway in New York (she said she got scared by riding in the subway once) and always drives. I perfectly understand how one might feel inside a subway car, but who ever drives in NYC? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
syu.edu Posted October 23, 2005 at 04:57 AM Report Share Posted October 23, 2005 at 04:57 AM my friends also basically told me to keep her. but i guess their judgement is biased 'cause they are guys and saw her dancing. afterall, i believe that for her, same as for me, the age difference is a little awkward. it seems to be no problem once you reach your 50's, but i am 20. she told me when she was 20, she had lots of fun and did not look for a serious relationship. well, so do i. i will wait and see. thanks a lot for you guys's inputs. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bhchao Posted October 23, 2005 at 07:04 AM Report Share Posted October 23, 2005 at 07:04 AM I don't think age should be an issue, as long as the age difference is not great enough that she could be your mother. (ex. Kutcher-Demi Moore, 16 years) The question is when the two of you meet. Generally speaking, girls mature earlier than guys. You are only 20 while she is 25. Although they mature faster than men, women at age 25 still lack the mental maturity to settle down or commit to a serious relationship. In my case, I am 29 while my date is 34. Today she appears far more self-assured, independent, and responsible than the fragile girl she was five years ago. Back then I hesitated in going for her given my own unpreparedness. Today I have no qualms in seeking a meaningful relationship with her. Your instincts appear to be correct based on what you described. Timing is very important for a successful relationship. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lu Posted October 23, 2005 at 02:41 PM Report Share Posted October 23, 2005 at 02:41 PM bhchao: those are gross generalizations >:-( And the reasoning doesn't make sense either. If women mature earlier than men, women should date older men. (Which is exactely what they often do.) And syu.edu: best just take it easy, see if you really like her and if she really likes you, and only then start calling her your girlfriend. Would be my advise. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Song You Shen Posted October 23, 2005 at 04:30 PM Report Share Posted October 23, 2005 at 04:30 PM Actually it's not a gross generalization. Women do mature faster (on average) than guys do. They also usually achieve puberty quicker. These are scientific and psychological facts. However, as far as relationships go, I do not agree with bhchao about how women at 25 are typically lack mental maturity to settle down. This is specific to each woman. I have many many friends have have gotten married from ages 17-24 (women). Women lack mental maturity for a relationship, no more than men do at the same age. It really depends on the person, how they grew up, and what they grew up around. Syn.edu, I would be hesitant in your situation. You only knew her a day, and she wanted to call you her boyfriend (only around her friends) even though she already has a boyfriend. She just wants to show you off to her friends, and this doesn't sound like a good relationship to be in right now. If I were you, I'd just try to be friends with her. Don't let her call you her boyfriend or anything like that. Don't go on dates, just hang out as friends and see where it leads. Definitly get to know her, as a person, for a while. It seems that you only know her reputation as a model right now. And even though it may be tempting to date her because of that, it would not be wise to jump into an unknown relationship so quickly. Take my word for it, it's not worth it. Youshen Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bhchao Posted October 23, 2005 at 06:50 PM Report Share Posted October 23, 2005 at 06:50 PM I am not saying that all women at age 25 lack the mental maturity to settle down. But typically speaking, a woman in her late 20's or early 30's have far more meaningful life experiences than say, a woman at age 25. Therefore the former tends to be more mature than the latter. Generally speaking, older female-younger male relationships work out best when the relationship starts at a much later age where both individuals have matured, and have more experience. Song, regarding your female friends who got married at ages 17-24, those situations are not a problem since the guy is older. But it is a whole different story when the woman is older than the guy by five years, and she is only 25. And we have all heard of stories about the older woman treating her younger guy as a boy toy. I totally agree that Syu should be hesitant and do some thinking about what this girl's motives are. If I were in his place, I would be suspicious of this girl. In his case the girl already viewed him as her boyfriend after just meeting him. Now what does this say about the girl? It does not hurt to be friends with the girl however. In the meantime, get to know more about her and how she ticks. The best relationships are those that develop over time, not ones that start overnight. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shatterstone Posted October 24, 2005 at 12:19 PM Report Share Posted October 24, 2005 at 12:19 PM i Suppose it all depends on the individual really, as for either tai or chinese girls being perticulally materialistic, english and american girls can be just as much if not worse. The chinese girls i know dont want anything for nothing, but they do expect a nice lifestyle ie nice house car etc, but then again who dosn't? Personally im not perticulally well off but my girl dosnt really care as long as we love each other. Her sister will only date wealthy guys though! as for them dating guys with BMW's if i argued on that one id be a bit of a hypocrite! Guess girls just want to be happy and have a good life, if possessions are most important to them then they aint worth bothering with Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ian_Lee Posted October 24, 2005 at 08:44 PM Report Share Posted October 24, 2005 at 08:44 PM I used to date Taiwanese girls slightly older than me in the college years (4-5 yrs). During that time (in the earlier '70s), HK and Taiwane students used to socialize together in the "Chinese Student Association". (By that time, there was no student from Mainland China in US.) And in the "China Night" which opened to public, the Taiwanese girls performed traditional Chinese dances and HK guys cooked the food. Most Taiwanese girls shunned Taiwanese guys and preferred HK guys because Taiwanese guys were mostly graduate students who had already spent a couple of years in mandatory military service in Taiwan before they came to US. They were older, more rigid and less active. A lot of HK guys married Taiwanese girls (at least 4 couples I know so far) after graduation. Some work out but some don't. By that time, the Taiwanese girls were very frugal. But I think they were more eager to acquire Green Card than the HK students did even though the latter faced the '97 issue. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ian_Lee Posted October 24, 2005 at 08:51 PM Report Share Posted October 24, 2005 at 08:51 PM Regarding girls from Mainland China, I never dated any but I know quite a few. I think they can be divided into two types: Those from the urban centers and those from the rural areas (a lot of recent immigrants in US are from the rural area). IMO they are quite materialistic especially those from the rural area. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ian_Lee Posted October 24, 2005 at 08:59 PM Report Share Posted October 24, 2005 at 08:59 PM I had also dated ABC and Singapore and Malaysian girls. I would say I have more common topics to chat with them. But frankly speaking I cannot stand the Singaporean girl I dated. I recalled I asked her how come there are so few public holidays in Singapore, she replied that it is because Singaproeans love to work hard! Well, if time can go back 20 years, of course I would prefer Korean girl with the look of Lee Young Ae! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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